I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
