well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
