I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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