**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
They took my balls.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Randomize
