I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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