big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
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Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
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You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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