Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
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