Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
