mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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