I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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