and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
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