he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
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Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
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Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
i think im in europe. pls send help
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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