at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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