im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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