I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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