Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I wannas sexs uuuuu
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
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