I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
