I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
