I didn't shave. On purpose
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
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