But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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