You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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