went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
