I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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