gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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