I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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