come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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