Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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