I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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