i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
