i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
