Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
honey bunches of taint.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
