it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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