Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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