did you get engaged???
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Randomize
