I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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