i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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