Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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