plz talk dirty to me
"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
