That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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