Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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