i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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