she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
you never un-have a 4some
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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