he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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