Texts From Last Night

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  (314): View more from Missouri

  In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.

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  (314): In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night. http://tfl.nu/bhg6
  Replies (12) Good night (1867) Bad night (3069)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.

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  (702): So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college. http://tfl.nu/456d
  Replies (47) Good night (8780) Bad night (760)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.

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  (573): Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend. http://tfl.nu/0oem
  Replies (15) Good night (4049) Bad night (1088)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee

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  (231): We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee http://tfl.nu/m4t7
  Replies (33) Good night (1442) Bad night (4228)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.

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  (902): Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines. http://tfl.nu/9k5b
  Replies (12) Good night (4716) Bad night (766)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.

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  (+61): We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well. http://tfl.nu/yavz
  Replies (21) Good night (1905) Bad night (2611)
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  (415): View more from California

  Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in

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  (415): Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in http://tfl.nu/whuh
  Replies (14) Good night (4540) Bad night (2159)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.

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  (937): she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks. http://tfl.nu/kgtb
  Replies (12) Good night (2979) Bad night (918)
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  (707): View more from California

  She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.

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  (707): She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place. http://tfl.nu/aqji
  Replies (9) Good night (5534) Bad night (987)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.

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  (210): Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT. http://tfl.nu/29iu
  Replies (17) Good night (4323) Bad night (952)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea

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  (727): Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea http://tfl.nu/mom5
  Replies (2) Good night (1085) Bad night (602)
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  (863): View more from Florida

  So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.

  (1-863): View more from Florida

  You're a fucking train wreck.

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  (863): So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal. (1-863): You're a fucking train wreck. http://tfl.nu/4qd3
  Replies (3) Good night (1566) Bad night (608)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?

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  (770): A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay? http://tfl.nu/s9ck
  Replies (8) Good night (501) Bad night (1483)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I was emotionally compromised.

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  (615): Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really? (423): I was emotionally compromised. http://tfl.nu/irpq
  Replies (1) Good night (703) Bad night (381)
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  (415): View more from California

  Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?

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  (415): Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license? http://tfl.nu/k1wl
  Replies (9) Good night (685) Bad night (179)

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