Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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