saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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