glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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