Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
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