I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
