Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
