brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
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